got my hair cream

One thing I'm still struggling with to this day, how to style my hair... I mean, that's a part of the black experience, the difficulties of taming an afro. What are my thoughts on it after having had one all my life. Are there benefits to an afro. It probably has some kinda benefits as far as not going bald or something I don't know the full spectrum of that stuff...

Basically my hair has always lacked moisture. Since most hair products are designed for white hair, they're not considering that black people's hair needs to be constantly moisturized to prevent over drying out and becoming coarse. So yeah I've never had the advantage of having hair care products designed to moisturize and soften my hair which is somewhat mixed hair and simply needs to be moistened to be tamed and not dry out too much...

I've been experimenting with everything under the sun to find that one product that works. FOUND NOTHING.

Then one day tried my sister's stuff. What a dumbass I am. She's just me but female, I should probably just use her stuff since she has the same hair as me, same genetics as me, and her hair's always been better than mine. I try one of her products one day. HOLY GOD, it just worked, my hair was like goku's from dragon ball, Just the perfect amount of softness and spikeyness to it. HOLY. So I looked at the ingredients and did some weird science to try and figure out what was making it actually moisturize my hair and keep it like that for hours. It wasn't perfect, but it worked a shit ton better than the normal hair treatments I use.

Argan... Oil... two little ingredient words I then did some research on and found out it's prettymuch the go to stuff to soften and moisturize hair all day...

Why am I going on about this right now like a little diva queen faggot talking about hair products for blacks?

Cuz I'm gonna need it. Got to have something decent on camera when I start heavily shooting the movie and I mean, yeah it's the only stuff that when I use it, it keeps the hair looking smooth and moist instead of dried out and brittle like a freakin brillo pad bullshit.

Sadly there's just not much interest in this world to cater to black issues and life styles. But yeah maybe I'll educate someone like me out there who's having trouble as I did in finding black specific remedies etc.

Makes you indeed recognize the necessity for black specific education programs instead of sending a black kid through a white designed white run system and wondering why the blue fart they can't make it through it. JUST SAIYAN!!!!!!!!!

thinking about star wars

shiiiit, I'm just struggling right now to figure out where they're going with the franchise. My brain is incapable of making sense of what we'll be getting down the pipe from JJ. I was thinking about it... Firstly my mind got the idea that yeah, do we honsetly care about Rey, Finn and Poe? Honestly, no I don't give two shits about them. I want to see what Luke, and Leia are up to. Now that we will sadly not be having Leia in the next movie, that leaves Luke, and wow, kinda not the star wars I was dreaming of in the final trilogy... All the prinicple beloved characters are just dead or elderly. What the blue bananas.

And JJ is like, just not going to bring a lot better or anything much greater than what he's delivered so far. What pull is there for this movie.

Star Wars hasn't had much success focusing on anything but the skywalkers and their story.

Lucas tried to swing it a bit towards newer ideas and characters and they all flopped, no one gives a toss bout quigon dooku grievous jango watto, no impact, no meaning to those characters, they're nothing. The driving force, heh, of star wars is the skywalker story. So yeah, I was thinking, no, I don't watch the original trilogy and think oh can't wait to get to the story of rey and random black storm trooper guy, fuck this skywalker shit... that stuff while interesting means little to the main story of the skywalkers. So now that the original trilogy actors are kinda leaving the franchise behind willingly and unwillingly what's going to draw people to star wars now?

I've seen this all before. They did this same passing the torch thing with star trek. They knew the old cast was aging, so they made some sort of movies to connect the old cast with the new cast who they wanted fans to feel were just as legit. It was a catastrophe. They did the same thing back then and apparently they're doing it now. I was hoping they'd avoid star trek's mistake of trying to force the old and new cast together at the same time getting rid of the old cast in some anti-climactic sad way that makes all they accomplished mean little or nothing...

I honestly never watched star wars saying, hell yeah, can't wait to see Luke fail at becoming a Jedi master, Leia NOT learning her jedi powers even a little bit, and Han going out like obiwan cuz we all know those characters are the same. Wtf... yeah, agree with mark hamill, Luke should have showed up after sensing his fucking friends were in danger through the force and actually done something... poor bastard having his character dragged through the mud in the new movies for whatever reason...

Does Kennedy and Lucasfilm even know these characters???

Jesus what are you assholes doing? Leia not learning her powers? "The LAST Jedi" HELLO, LEIA's still a jedi too! wtf are you smoking?

It was always fascinating to wonder what the hell Leia would have been as a fellow jedi master at Luke's new Jedi Temple. Holy fuck would that be interesting story. All of it thrown in the garbage and for some reason Luke is considered the last jedi... When he's a twin and his sister has powers she's yet to fully make use of and is potentially one of the most powerful jedi to ever exist. None of the decision to NOT have Leia train a little smidge makes any sense. Luke clearly says in RotJ that Leia will learn her powers too. One of the reasons Luke feels confident confronting Vader is because Leia will be able to continue the line of the Jedi and he truly isn't the last. Well boy was his ass wrong...

So, yeah I'm going to guess that despite not learning an ounce of how to use the force, Leia will pass into the force and dissapear, That's the only way they can make sense of her not showing up at all in the last movie... sadly and I'm truly sad about it, she will have to die at some point in the Last Jedi. Unless, and this would actually make things interesting, Rey absorbs her.

Rumor is that Rey is Leia daughter from another man, not Han. If that's the case, I mean it's good either way, luke's daughter, Leia's daughter. It'd be really fascinating if Leia learned the power to pass her spirit into Rey. If Jedi had this power, that'd actually be damn neat, or it's actually a sith power, whoa now we're really making things crazy... but yeah, Leia still lives inside of Rey after they fuse and Rey becomes like even more powerful... silly but works and keeps Leia in the story and makes Rey actually have some kind of complexity and interesting character issues.

I'd like that better than just having Leia just die. Use the force and have her ghost possess rey and become like a special thing rey can tap into, the Leia side of her, that'd be awesome as hell....

I refuse to believe Leia never trained. It'd be interesting if yeah, they had some bait and switch, make us THINK Leia never trained, but she's been working on her powers for decades and knows some deep level jedi powers that leads to her busting them out at a key moment when luke gets injured or something... then it's revealed she knows how to become immortal by passing her spirit into another Jedi's body, oh my god please do this, it'd be the only way to keep these movies awesome after losing my love Carrie. Still don't want to believe she's gone... this would help ease the pain in a way and be a metaphor for life, death, and rebirth....

Oh well, just had these thoughts and stuff, that's all....

JJ Abrams will be making the Last Star Wars movie

How do I feel about it... Shit, not what I hoped for. I don't think it's what HE hoped for either. He wanted to get his teeth cut on star wars, then move on. Now he's going down that slide again. It's kinda sacrilegious, allowing a star trek director to make star wars films. But we all knew he was already making star wars movies using star trek. The joke was that, ok, just let the guy make a real star wars movie for the hell of it...

He's middle of the road though. He'll deliver a movie that you watch, say eh that was ok, then not care about ten minutes later. Even the prequels made you think about something or admire the insane amount of complex work that went into them... JJ can't deliver even that though he's alright, not a bad director... He's just so stiff and technical, like a machine. No soul to his directing...

All of his movies are like that. I'm not going to be nice about this. Star Wars means more to me than anything. I don't want it to get kinda half assed nowadays. Do it properly!

Star Wars has to have a heart, visually stunning imagery, almost biblical level of passion put into it. So that when you watch it, you're swept away to another world completely. Where the prequels failed, especially RotS, Lucas obviously broke down his realistic emotionally driven dramatic universe and turned it into a big dumb videogame cut scene...

Something fishy is happening over at Lucasfilm. Supposedly they had a broad outline to things, but never a fully planned idea of where all these events were going. We can tell... I'm guessing the last movie is really in a bad state as there REALLY is no plan for how it will end and they're kinda having to scramble for ideas last minute now with no Leia in the script, and the director being fired for being such a hacky director...

Man, it's tough to make a sequel that has to tie up events from previous movies in itself, hell of a lot tougher when you don't have a road map for where the hell it all is supposed to go. Peter Jackson will tell you he made a mistake going full hog into the hobbit movies without planning it all the way. He had to scramble to make sense of the bullcrap story he was trying to tell since he didn't plan it out before shooting it,  he admits he winged the production and didn't actually plan it as throuroughly as the Lotr movies were... we can tell.

Potter could have definitely used better planning, that's for sure. Probably the most meandering bunch of movies ever made just going all over the place and ultimately putting stuff in the movies that didn't get paid off at all in the sequels because the damn books weren't written yet before they shot the movies... so tragic, good set of films, fumbled by the reality that they shot the movies before the final books were written, so a lot of potential was wasted....

Gotta plan these things... Gotta. I mean, if I had it my way, I'd make it a real experimental other worldy bizarre star wars movie that really takes it to a new level. That's not what we'll get. We'll get a safe ordinary decenet force awakens style film again, and that's a shame...

But obviously now that a female is heading Lucasfilm, they have no balls. Was that too harsh? I'm kinda pissed that's how it is....

Trailer Finished

Decided on a more hip hoppy happy trailer than my original plan for a down beat epic dramatic trailer...

Worked hard for 2 days like a madman to make it. Not my hardest edit, but definitely up there... came out ok. Going to make the final film stuff a lot more cinematic and fix this camera's poor white balance and exposure levels so hopefully the picture is far better... take a look, something to see....;p

Working on the Trailer

Yep, I mean, the TRAILER. I've been doing Teasers for a while now... I'm going to be cutting together the actual first full length TRAILER for Static Shock The MOVIE.

That's why I've been filming some scraps of the final battle scenes and opening shot of the film. I didn't have shit to put in the trailer so now I do!

And now that I've grown a pair of balls and actually scouted the location where I'll be shooting the final battle scene... I'm going to fine tune all the layouts I've made to actually take place in the environment...

Learned a lot about making movies and what it takes gotta say... you can't respect or even critique film making unless you make them yourself in my opinion. From here forward I believe that. Don't talk about a process and discipline you don't understand or have ever tried to do. You gain a new understanding of the struggle and effort that goes into movies after you try to make your own.

It's not easy. Demands a lot of complex work.

Like, just today I was losing my mind because I didn't have the Boom Costume fully even made up and thought I lost parts of it... So lesson number one, have all the costumes ready before even making the thing. I'd have had to delay the film for a while until I could buy back what I thought I lost from his costume.

Truth be told I didn't plan the movie meticulously, didn't really think I needed too, but yeah probably should have. Going to be doing a lot of guess work as far as what goes where in terms of frieda's character and how she fits in, the biggest ? mark of the project. I simply don't have her nailed down in full as far as my ideas on what to do with that stuff. I don't know how I'm going to make it work yet, but whatever... Got bigger problems.

It's tough as hell to shoot in a jungle environment. I tried doing stunt falls, but was scared shitless of injuring myself on the rocks and trees. I'm a risk taker at times and don't mind a little pain for the good of the film. And I'm an athletic son of a bitch, so whatever right, wrong. I look at the shit I shot and I'm obviously constantly trying to protect myself as I "fall" to the ground. Wow, gotta work on that shit....

Looking to work on the film every morning at 5am up until whenever I feel I've got it or whenever people start bringing their dogs to the park to go poop. That's just, annoying. But they gotta let the dogs poop.

I just want to film and finish the final battle stuff, get it locked away fully. Then worry about the shit in the middle. Gonna be a lot of jokes, fun stuff, but I can't feel confident shooting that until I know I've got the final battle down. And really I just want to actually have a good point to aim towards, all the beginning is shot, just not the dreaded epic finale. Just want to get it over with and stop having to stinking shoot scenes while thinking about how I'm gonna have such a hard time shooting the final fight. Screw it and just shoot the final fight I say. Plus the most obvious reason, I can't have it take place in the goddamn autumn.. gotta have some summer and use it. So yeah, I mean, just it's best to get it done now...

I'll say it though maybe I should keep it secret, I will be needing to be in pretty great shape for the final stuff in the film. Which I'm far from. So it's going to take me quite a while to get that shape. So yeah, reason why I want to get the final battle done too, so I can concentrate on the part where I need to be ripped up.

Will I get it done. YES. I know what I have to do. I can do it. I can see the end of the tunnel here. I'm an ameature with goddamn After Effects and green screen, so deal with how bad those are going to be. But now that I've actually taken the bitter pill and rolled around in freakin thorny terrible jungle bushes and experienced the warzone that is film making gurilla style, yep, I can knock this final battle out in a week.

I give myself until the end of the month to get it done...

Trailer on the way, stay tuned.

Thawtz on film making

I'd rather draw all day than film. Anyone can't talk anymore, just shut your mouth if you've never gotten out there and filmed and acted on camera. It's just bone crushing exhausting stuff. Bravo to all the people who do it. As a film watcher all my life, wanted to get into it, going out into the park and doing it though, want to just shoot myself in the head. It's terrible.

You have no time, the camera always gets shit in the lens, the lighting is never good. As you can see in those photos the lighting is awful. As it was a cloudy day, the sun was obscured.

Yeah it's tough, tougher than doing regular sketch art without a doubt to me. It's just you and the paper, a quiet, simple straight forward dance. The hectic bullshit of actual filming, oh god damn...

As for what I'm planning.... Well, I've shot stuff and lots of stuff and more stuff and just trying to figure out what exposure levels and shit look good out there so it has some sense of professionalism to it.

I've discovered how cool and cinematic things can look when you have multiple layers to a shot. Where there's shit in the foreground to kinda add depth to the shot rather than it being just plain old one dimensional kinda thing.

I enjoy the final result when it works, hate the struggle to get there with a passion. I'm looking forward to getting back into what I really like to do, sketch art, and making animation and videos. I'm all about just building things from my head into the composition, not trying to cobble together my vision from the environment and whatever randomly happens when the camera rolls... didn't know I'd hate it so much....

The final battle scene rest assured will be fantastic. The park I am shooting in is mostly un-occupied as it's not a children's park, basically some place people go to walk their dogs. I've known of it all my childhood as it's always been there accross the street from the library I used to go to, but never actually went deep into it. It's breathtaking how gorgeous the place is and huge, so yeah my fears of being bothered by people as I film this thing, not truly merited. There's barely anyone in the park since it's just a big forrest gump. Glad I have easy access to it and will be able to get amazing visuals there...

That's all for now... I'm going to just keep trying to get a job and keep pushing forward as usual with my life as much as many apparently are pushing for my death... strange seesaw I'm on nowadays.

Current Stupid part 2

Seems to be a microcosm of the world, twitter.

I notice that. The white or whatever else twitter users are on and on about politics, puppies, kittens, current events, family and friends, or the silly happenings of the moment.

Black twitter is basically: Damn this world is racist.

I mean, that's like not a joke, but it exposes how society works. There's everybody else having a good time and then there's black people complaining all day about being treated like lower class citizens.

Of course the topic of the moment, an NFL player got rocked by cops after they saw him running from possible gun shots fired. Didn't I make a post about how cops love to chase and pounce down running black guys. Probably should try not to run at all around cops (Yes I know about blake and how he got rocked by cops despite not doing anything) if you're black. It's something for them to do, they're bored, got no one to bully today, of course they're going to find a black guy to harass.

This is not news. Of course cops hate black people. Of course most of society hates black people. Of course black people even hate black people.

Who gives a fuck. Live your life and stop making it about me me me... You're gonna be old and wonder where the hell your youth went...

I don't understand that. I mean I never contemplated what the fuck I'd do at 31 but I'm trying to squeeze as much of my life goals out at this point as I can before I truly become an old black man and have to deal with the assfest of being on that side of life.

Ain't gonna be fun. I mean I don't know if any age is good for being black, truth be told. Only thing is if you're under 18 you have less drama cuz you're a "kid" and don't get the full load of the racist world bearing down on you. Forget it after that. You'll be sipping an ecto cooler and minding your own business and have a gang of kkkops bother you wherever you go, whatever you do...

I don't let it bother me. It's not like I have a life. I mean yeah if I had a career, girlfriend, all kinds of things probably would be bothered by the harassment from mini hitlers with badges.

Now comes the raw deal. If I see a gaggle of black teens hanging out at the bus stop will I walk through them to get to where I'm going? FUCK NO.

I've gone through that stage of high school black attack, kinda feel like if I get bullied ONE more time by some teen or young adult black person, it's done. I'm killing him.

Didn't know I'd end up dealing with those guys at work. Those idiots are WHY the KKK still exists. The black people who don't give a fuck and ARE trying to stir shit up with everyone and were born assholes. Boondocks has a whole episode dedicated to pure evil black kids all of use black people encounter as we grow up. You know, that black kid who's just not an ounce good. He's existing to confirm and live up to every stereotype there is for blacks and just be a numbskull all his life till he rots in jail. They exist.

I mean my brother started out as one of those, but he started having kids and he's since grown up out of that "im a gangster" stage of his life and wants to take care of his kids and give them the life he didn't achieve.... understandable... and I sympathize with those black kids who are bullies but have the potential to turn around. But sorry, the black kids who are pure rotten garbage, I'm never going to give a shit about, ever... been there done that.... fuck with me and I'll knock your dumb ass out.

So overall do I give a shit when black people bemoan the poor treatment they recieve in life on twitter? Yes and No.

You can't always play the race card...

I was racially profiled by cops when I was sitting around waiting for the train, bunch of them came out ready to spray me up with bullets for being black and existing in their corner of the universe...

Sadly as much as it angers me that they did that, I know why. I'm expecting and have had my expectations confirmed many times, young black males to be up to no good TODAY... I've barely gone a week without dealing with some retardedness from dumbass black kids, so put yourself in a cops position, scare the shit out the next gangsterlicious black kid and make him stand down and not put up a ruckus in public, or give those guys reason to feel they can act out like wild fucktards as is their MO...

It's a tragic thing. It's wrong that there exist a sense of overwhelming racism targeted towards a certain group, then that group of people themselves knowing why it exists at the same time...

In my opnion, the onus is on black people. Let the videos speak for themselves. Blacks being good innocent people and getting tragically treated poorly. Not have shit like the bunch of black kids torturing a dude on facebook as a defense for cops profiling blacks. Don't add fuel to the fire... I know I'm talking to a brick wall, but it's a thought...