Welcome Holmes

Damn, I'm seriously dissapointed with myself, i accidently got a deep crease in my drawing of eden during her battle with android v-1 (viper First generation) at school. I drew it to test my skills as i begin getting back into finally doing all the story over again, and one of the things that was always hard to do was keep the hundreds of pages clean. One time i re-did a much better version of my ronda vs marlboroo comic and then i don't know what happened, it got burned a little by the radiator or whatever, and it was just a complete tragedy my friends. I had such good drawings that were totally messed up.

oh well, gotta keep on movin. so fuck yeah the new sherlock holmes show is great. because it's a man's show about men being men, reminds me of a lot of great tv from the 90s that were about clever men going toe to toe with other clever men. live action wise, i'd have to mention x-files, pretender, fresh prince of bell air, etc. it's endless. todays tv sucks sorry.

so it's csi but with sherlock holmes instead of some know it all science cop or lawyer like in law and order. Having read holmes all my life i of course had to see if they got it right and besides the main actor being kind of baby-face-ish, they nailed it. Holmes seems to solve the mystery before he even knew it existed, perfectly accurate. I can't wait to see him whoop moriarty's ass.

they should make this a real regular series instead of a miniseries event thing, but alas, whatever... good tv can't be taken for granted. a lot of people compare him to house, probably right, but i hate house, complete prick, and extremely unprofessional in a medical environment to be acting so childishly belligerent, and besides that he's got nothing going on, no friends, no humanity, he's mr. bad attitude and that's all she wrote. holmes in the new show admits he doesn't care about the victims in the crimes he solves he's in it for the challenge, but at the same time, he seems to actually sort of treasure having someone to talk to about his mysteries even if he's only usuing watson as an outside ear or possible second opinion. wow, actual character, he's not just some robot. and that's what i like about this new holmes.

that makes me kind of actually care about whether he's got the goods to take on someone on his level, when the character's just this invincible super freak with no flaws, he gets boring. Like they kind of made a big deal out of whether holmes would give a shit if moriarty killed watson. it's left ambiguous whether holmes did or didn't care. I like that. Even if they eventually make holmes out to truly be a ruthless super genius, at least they didn't make him seem completely inhuman.

so the series cliffjhanger comes to a stalemate as holmes threatens to kill himself and moriarty at the same time. got to say i like how the guy plays moriarty as kind of this sick bizarro version of sherlock, he's not BAD, or the devil, he's just sherlock if he was a criminal, simple, kind of like the natural consequence of sherlock even existing is that if he exists so does his opposite. Of course sherlock won't shoot the gun, and of course moriarty won't kill sherlock, they need each other. very interesting what the future will bring from this series.

lust for suffering

I've got 2 things i want to write about... first is my trying to understand some of the behavior I've witnessed in other people. Granted, we will never achieve peace, but to come across folks who upon first meeting you wish you death, is not only terribly confusing but also extremely annoying. I, believe it or not, don't want anybody fighting anybody for any reason, yet some people it would seem are war mongers to the core.

first time i caught wiff of these people, at least post pubescent (kids are cruel yadda yadda, no need to go there, fuck kids) I'm talking beyond that, and it was at a forum i frequented that's probably still around today, a star wars forum where i delved into the deepest levels of star wars discussion and followed my passion for the series as it started up again with the new movies... some jackass was going around harassing everyone and totally blew my 16 year old mind when he layed me out with a KO post that completely devastated me. i look back and regret not shrugging that guy off. That's what that freak wanted, to get to me, WHY is the question... i guess there's a cheap thrill from slamming someone.

I know i have it some times, we lust for other's pain at times. but geez i'm talkin this guy was nutz,digging into everybody every day, like it was his whole life.

and it doesn't end there. some fat woman when i was looking for a job, went ape crazy when she saw my resume wasn't full of work. And she made a frown face at me as if she was ready to beat me up. I told her I was going to school. What was i 21 when this happened, and it was the truth, but i realize now that she was a fucking psycho bitch and nothing more. i should have ignored her and gone about my business. She wanted me to feel ashamed for not having a full time job by my age, make me feel off, but most people don't have their shit together yet, and so I was a dumb fuck for taking her seriously.

so apparently some people are crazy by choice. i know goddamnit that there are people who don't have a choice, they're born crazy can't think straight at all, but then there are those who are deliberately annoying jerks because they get a kick out of it. Thank god, I'm male and I rule the world, at least as far as a black guy's concerned.

Oh what else was it i was going to add, oh, I'm a delta airlines ramp agent, didn't know delta was the largest airline in the world when i signed up for it, pretty neat, anyway you passengers are killing us with the baggage.

1. stop packing your whole house, just essentials please. and 2. why the hell are you arriving for the flight something like 20 minutes before departure, we have to load your heavy shit 1 by 1 in the aircraft, so it's going to be a bitch to have no time to get it done. Sorry just had to get that out there, this job is brutal, but can be made a little more manageable with some help from the passengers. I guess they don't know a human being will be lifting their shit at some point.

raven

I think about sabrina frato alot, and why wouldn't I, she was the first girl i ever touched in any sexual way. I was I guess sneak attacked by her tits that day. Needless to say, i've never felt happier than that moment. It matters not now though, 'nevermore' will i see her, and so be it, it'd be a strange relationship, me always wondering if she's just an undercover agent looking for trouble. Kind of makes me suspicious of any future girls i might meet. EVERY and i mean EVERY girl i met on my little military adventure was a spy sent to mess with me.

they're just doing a job so don't take it personally though, right, just a job, day in day out same shit.

sure did make me think what having a wife and kids would be like though. never really seriously thought about it because it was such an impossible far far away concept, why give it much thought. something tells me though that such is my fate, as was reiterated by one of my mti's in the airforce, that it is unavoidable for a person like me, that these things called children will be existing at some point. i live with this knowledge with both dread and joy at the thought.

That's what I'll name the girl btw.

to boldly go

Artistic drive is a nebulous thing, often inconsistent and unpredictable. One day you'll have a great idea you're passionate about, the next you'll not know where to begin. i reside between these two extremes as I begin navigating the tumultuous seas of drawing my mini opus, one of 3 pieces i want to finish before i fuck off this planet, and although seriously determined to get it done, i don't know if it'll be my best effort since I'm literally redoing most of it.

like I said long ago, I threw it away when i found a girl i was interested in, no need for a mountain of porn anymore... still I've grown so fond of creating the stories, and drawing them etc, that I really still don't want to let it go. what's more I don't even know if I'm still as good as i used to be. No matter, the wheels are in motion and this thing's going forward whether I personally am satisfied with the results or not.

One cool thing that came about due to the creation of my Ronda character was meeting the real thing. As some kind of cruel joke, the military had some gorgeous woman imitate my beloved character right in front of me, fucked me right up seeing her in the flesh. they got everything right, her height, eye color, hair color, and curves, I analyzed everything withing the small time we met, whoever she was, she's good... such a unique situation that i never saw coming, but oh so mammorable.

punks

so i live a block away from my old high school. and now that schools back in full swing, i see the same old shit i saw damn near 10 years ago when i started going there, hard to believe it's been that long. but yeah since you start at 14 and im now 24, its been about 10 years. 6 since i finished. If i knew better i'd have never gone to high school at all, sure, you won't find many supporters of that since people have been brainwashed to not question the school system, but it really didn't help me in any way that matters to me now. so what was the point. all the stuff about hunting down employment I learned through the school of hard knocks, aka real life itself. I must conclude that high school's really nothing more than a big mini prison to keep young fuckers occupied for hours all day or something. Put these kids to work. wtf is the point of training them for years to do something that has shit squat to do with their ultimate occupation.

but most of all, i regret listening to both my parents and teachers about staying away from girls. Now I'm just annoyed and aggravated by how people who are digging deep into pussies every night are treating me as if I'm one of those guys who's, how do i put it,... generally a little asshole, that kid who doesn't care about anything but fucking. sure would like too. But I'm 24 the age when you're too old for the girls who'd spread their cheeks for you and too young and immature for the girls your own age. FUCK.

that was the biggest mistake i ever made, maybe it'll pay off and not seem like such a misstep, i don't know yet. I sit puzzled by the hypocritical views on sexuality held by very powerful and supposedly smart people. at this high school they have annual dances in which boys and girls are encouraged to hook up, and i guess figure out how to fuck after school? i don't know what the parents of the world want for the kids. why not be honest? why play games like this?

sigh sigh sigh. I mean, i had chances aplenty, was never averse to fucking the crap out of one my cutie classmates, of course not, but i believed it was better to avoid that stuff, dedicate my time to star wars etc. now HILARIOUSLY people want to toss me under a bus for not conforming to their expectations regarding old tired courting rituals and ultimately marriage itself.

it's too much for my mind to take in, since it's such a huge about face from the days of taking meaningless tests and getting accused of being gay daily, but i know if i try i can understand why people are so retarded. i just don't think it's worth the effort.

mumbuwumba

The REAL Old Busters!!!

i'm torn. soon this will air on tv, but for now it's been revealed that bill murray, perhaps for the last time in his career as an actor has put on his old duds as a ghostbuster, why i don't know... he's either losing it with old age, or he's hinting that gb3 is on the horizon. But looking at him and having seen indy 4's shitbombing of the indy name, i'm not as excited as i should be about it. I want a gb3 more than anybody, and I'll take an awful gb over another shitty seth rogen comedy any day, by god, but it has to be....

i don't even want to realize it's a gb movie until they pull out the proton packs. it can't be a nostalgia fest like so many of these movies end up being. and in fact the second movie was to some extent. dare i say it has to be an actual work of art or some shit. Jesus christ, what are you trying to pull murray, you asshole.