Just hate it.

So yeah it's been more than rough. Toughest edit I've ever done, ever.

I look forward to just editing little stuff like the frieda static interactions etc.

Ron Howard doing reshoots on his reshoots for Solo, wtf is going on... He's either trying to fix and patch together what's severely broken or something, I don't know.

I have to say, you can plan, hope to do a film a certain way, then it just takes its own course when it pleases as you finally get into it and it kinda grows and becomes its own thing for better or worse.

I don't know... Poor guy's setting himself up pretty bad. If the movie doesn't meet expectations he'll take the blame when it wasn't his movie to start with. He's honestly trying to make something from junkyard scraps.

Making any movie is tough. Making a star wars movie is damn tough. But not for him, it's just that he's fighting the fact that it wasn't his movie to cast, to set up, to mold from the get go, that's kinda unfair to him. I'm betting that behind the scenes he's been told that if this does well the sequel will be all him. Blank check, go nuts, that sort of thing.

So where am I with my project, very sick of it. It's not easy. It's not just, cut cut cut put this there put this here, good to go. It's figure out 20 different ways to cut it at once, figure out the pace, music, the logic of the shit. it's a lot.

Thankfully youtube is full of little fun videos to watch as I edit so I'm not totally concentrating on the madness of struggling with this fan film, plus porn. I mean that's what I do, edit a bit, watch porn, watch youtube, it's not so bad.

Twitter is also a good distraction. Hate myself for seeking attention on there, it's not a good thing. Like when I get a porn star I like reacting to my post, I start thinking I have a chance of hitting that ass. How insane can a guy get. Yeah right. I guess I'm potentially a guy they could get boned by but I'm still a virgin, don't think a girl like that who's eaten a million dicks wants mr. noob. It's funny to them to make us dream. She's a fantastic person though the girl I follow on twitter. If things were different I could see myself with her on a different more personal level beyond the fact that she's gorgeous. She's just cool as hell.

Well I'm gonna dive in again and continue to torture myself with this crap... Do whatever your doing today, my day will be filled with far less enjoyment.