I am now Captain America.
Good GOD. This lecithin stuff is like the real super soldier serum. I was lifting weights and thinking "this is too easy."
HOLY FUCK.
I'm going to have fun with this.
Sunday, December 30, 2012
Lecithin
Holy shit, why don't they tell us about this stuff. So I started reading about how to increase ejaculate, for the purpose of getting a better orgasm and ultimately better sleep out of it. Turns out they recommend taking Zinc and some articles say take Lecithin. It's funny, I take the zinc and lecithin at the same time one day, and i go fucking staright to sleep after that. And I have a weird son of a bitch dream where I grow a crazy beard and I'm obsessed with the fact that the beard is messed up and I don't have a mustache, and I'm just focusing on the negative side of my face, and it's just making no sense. Then I wake up and I feel for the beard I was dreaming about and all I feel is my little stuble, and i come back to my senses. But the fact remains that I got better sleep that night than I had in a long while. So I was over the moon. And I woke up feeling fresh as a daisy. One of those feelings when you feel better than you have in a while and it seems like you're back to normal that kind of thing.
So I think to myself... it's the zinc that did it. I then take more zinc the next day. No sale pal. It doesn't do shit. I don't sleep well, back to basics ya know, lame brain pain.
Then I for the fuck of it, decide to take zinc and lecithin again, since I had the pills there next to the zinc, and it's a wrap. I'm out again, and have another weird ass dream. This time, I'm on the floor and I'm just spazzing out. Going berserk.
But once again my body is better rested. I feel like I'm back on track. Got some good fucking sleep for once.
Turns out it's the lecithin. That stuff is like a lubricant for the body. And it works. My brain sucked the shit out of my stomach ya know. I could just feel it traveling up to my brain, and it was sweet. All my headaches were damped, not eliminated, but the sharpness of the pain, is gone. I wish I took this stuff back at tsa, cuz I would have not let nothing bother me. This stuff is the cure I was looking for. I'll be damned. I'm going to tell my sister about it, see she heard of it... yeah. But I mean, we'll need to give it more time to work its magic But I'm just overjoyed. Years ago in college, my brain for whatever reasons changed and flipped the switch so that there was no more euphoric sensation from masturbating. I'd do it, get a brief high, then nothing... Now I know. My body for whatever reason, was deprive of lecithin. Which is some kind of brain and body lubricant. It smooths out the body's operation, and relaxes you, kinda like an antidepressant. Which is great, if I can get the same benefits and not have to go down that road of trying experimental drugs from some pharmaceutical company.
I'm back baby. I've never felt more alive. I've been living a half life up until this point. i'm up, I'm motivated. I don't even want to jerk off. I feel like I want to do stuff. Jump around. have fun. Grab some titties. Whatever.
Lecithin. baby... only problem.... like I said, those dreams man. Thing is. Once it gets in your brain and starts lubricating and healing the trauma in there, it connects neurons that were previously dead or whatever, and increases your brain's powers, and that must be why I was fucking tripping out during sleep. My brain was able to push itself harder than it has in a long time. And even now, I feel it in me, giving me power that I didn't have yesterday.
Highly recommened. I mean, I'll have all the crazy dreams I want as long as I can live my life without being burdened by my libido's bullshit.
Gift from God, baby.
So I think to myself... it's the zinc that did it. I then take more zinc the next day. No sale pal. It doesn't do shit. I don't sleep well, back to basics ya know, lame brain pain.
Then I for the fuck of it, decide to take zinc and lecithin again, since I had the pills there next to the zinc, and it's a wrap. I'm out again, and have another weird ass dream. This time, I'm on the floor and I'm just spazzing out. Going berserk.
But once again my body is better rested. I feel like I'm back on track. Got some good fucking sleep for once.
Turns out it's the lecithin. That stuff is like a lubricant for the body. And it works. My brain sucked the shit out of my stomach ya know. I could just feel it traveling up to my brain, and it was sweet. All my headaches were damped, not eliminated, but the sharpness of the pain, is gone. I wish I took this stuff back at tsa, cuz I would have not let nothing bother me. This stuff is the cure I was looking for. I'll be damned. I'm going to tell my sister about it, see she heard of it... yeah. But I mean, we'll need to give it more time to work its magic But I'm just overjoyed. Years ago in college, my brain for whatever reasons changed and flipped the switch so that there was no more euphoric sensation from masturbating. I'd do it, get a brief high, then nothing... Now I know. My body for whatever reason, was deprive of lecithin. Which is some kind of brain and body lubricant. It smooths out the body's operation, and relaxes you, kinda like an antidepressant. Which is great, if I can get the same benefits and not have to go down that road of trying experimental drugs from some pharmaceutical company.
I'm back baby. I've never felt more alive. I've been living a half life up until this point. i'm up, I'm motivated. I don't even want to jerk off. I feel like I want to do stuff. Jump around. have fun. Grab some titties. Whatever.
Lecithin. baby... only problem.... like I said, those dreams man. Thing is. Once it gets in your brain and starts lubricating and healing the trauma in there, it connects neurons that were previously dead or whatever, and increases your brain's powers, and that must be why I was fucking tripping out during sleep. My brain was able to push itself harder than it has in a long time. And even now, I feel it in me, giving me power that I didn't have yesterday.
Highly recommened. I mean, I'll have all the crazy dreams I want as long as I can live my life without being burdened by my libido's bullshit.
Gift from God, baby.
Saturday, December 29, 2012
Get back to the kitchen
I don't like women working. Period.
Who am I to say that? But I'm thinking about it and stuff while I was naked in the tub, women these days need a reality check. And things would be so much better if they stopped trying to be men.
I just got let go by toys r us, and only reason for it is because it's a female dominated work place. Girls everywhere, and typically it's not the most laborious job so it's easy for a female to do.
I get that. I'm now in a rut again, totally unemployed, low on money, only my wits to save me in the end.
I think maybe to say just fuck it and kill myself, fuck it.... who cares about a nigga, especially me. But then i think about God, and kids, and life and maybe trying to accomplish something good, I don't fucking know man... I just don't know. Ya see, I always considered myself to be like Luke Skywalker or Superman, a good guy, a hero, but then ya got so much people who are like the devil in human form basically trying to bring you into their dark side of life. And I'm like "dude, that's not right. No..." so I'm struggling man... What does it mean to be a hero?
Anyway, yeah, gotta get back on track. Figure I'll try and volunteer at a hospital, possibly get a full time position there. Like I said, health care industry is permanent, and they pay through the nose, so you're good if you get into that. Set fo life.
Who am I to say that? But I'm thinking about it and stuff while I was naked in the tub, women these days need a reality check. And things would be so much better if they stopped trying to be men.
I just got let go by toys r us, and only reason for it is because it's a female dominated work place. Girls everywhere, and typically it's not the most laborious job so it's easy for a female to do.
I get that. I'm now in a rut again, totally unemployed, low on money, only my wits to save me in the end.
I think maybe to say just fuck it and kill myself, fuck it.... who cares about a nigga, especially me. But then i think about God, and kids, and life and maybe trying to accomplish something good, I don't fucking know man... I just don't know. Ya see, I always considered myself to be like Luke Skywalker or Superman, a good guy, a hero, but then ya got so much people who are like the devil in human form basically trying to bring you into their dark side of life. And I'm like "dude, that's not right. No..." so I'm struggling man... What does it mean to be a hero?
Anyway, yeah, gotta get back on track. Figure I'll try and volunteer at a hospital, possibly get a full time position there. Like I said, health care industry is permanent, and they pay through the nose, so you're good if you get into that. Set fo life.
Thursday, December 27, 2012
porn possibilities and perceptions
I'm an avid porn viewer.
As is probably 99% of the world. If there's an industry that will never die it's porn. Some industries are permanent. Transportaion, Food, Construction, health care, what else... well you get the point.
I was just thinking about it... as I was watching this gorgeous angel do her thang... it's just so easy now to get porn.
We had to earn that shit back in the day. Personally I kinda miss it. Specifically the 90s and its many quirks. Tv was a mixed bag back then, but the shows that were good, were fucking good, man. Tv now is horrible. Only thing good is the korra airbender show and that's not even half as good as the best shit from the 90s. So that right there tells you how much tv has declined as of late, and it's not necessarily tv's fault. It's 2 factors at work. The people who made great tv are getting older, and retiring. One can ask themself why there's no more classic looney tunes, well Mel blanc died. And god bless the man, he did bugs bunny up until the day his voice couldn't possibly do it any more. That's great. But the second factor is that the internet has become to many the new TV. It's evolving now, it's becoming a place where people are actually developing programs, sketches, cartoons and trying to take a bite out of tv. It's not bad. It's just it's losing that underground basement quality and becoming the corporate nightmare that is tv these days.
Nevermind that.... Getting back to porn though. I used to have to dig deep for porn. I mean, I literally took 3 years out of my life and drew tons of porn comics that I regret to this day having trashed because I loved what I accomplished. I have plans to redo the whole thing, but it's hard to come to terms with what it all means... what's the point? Have a big pile of porn and do what with it? I don't know whether I should even worry about the future, since I'm not going to be around to care anyway right? Just make the bloody thing and enjoy it while it lasts, thats all we can do...
I mean she deserves it. I designed and created my heart and soul on paper, I'll never just let her die. She'll always be a part of me, forever.
My point is however, the ease at which one can aquire porn is just disappointing to me now. You know how rare it was to find anal porn, or a porn that "looked" like anal from certain angles. You have to really loook back at porn and see that there was rarely any anal or if you got lucky the guy missed the pussy for a second and it went in the ass. Sometimes that happend and it was glorious.
I remember back in high school, that's when I first saw anal. I watched the FUCK out of that video. It was amazing. Now I look back on it and it's no where near the type of ass fucking you can find these days. But that's what I'm saying, there's so much of it now, it's become less special.
I guess things have escalated. Because there's hd right in your face porn of a bunch of girls taking dick in the ass, every porn has to have that now. It's like, "click" wonder what kind of porn this is going to be. Girl bends over and eats a dick with her ass hole. Oh, more anal.
ya know... for years butt sex was really considered extreme porn. Yes, back in the 90s even porn had limits. No beastiality, no anal, none of this extreme crazy shit we have now as the norm. And some porn was even shot like a real movie, so it was even more special when you actually gave a shit about the person being fucked.
Do I want to go back to that? Yeah sorta. I mean I'm no prude. I have a very flexible open mind. I'm like a really cool laid back dude, not a care in the world. So bring on the titties. Hell if I had it my way, I'd be cool with girls just walking around fucking naked, fuck it man... but you do lose something. If girls were naked all the time, finally getting to see them naked wouldn't be anything special. It's because we attempt to be civilized and shit, that it's so amazing to finally get a glimpse of a girl's naked sensitive body.
But I do believe it's lowering standards. Especially for girls. I can't imagine what girls these days are going through or what they're expected to do with the overwhelming amount of evidence to the contrary of whatever feminist ideals they hold. No woman can ever really take a stand on women being clean innocent princesses anymore. And it's their own fault anyway... *shrugs*
It's like, we're getting way too far of track. It's like, if society were to become like porn, what would actually "be" the porn after that? Just like how every porn started having anal in it, anal's getting boring, so there's now a lot of interracial all over the place, and DP and creampies. What's next?
I hope we get into more cinematic porn myself. Straight up porn is eventually going to get boring. I personally would love to have the next wave of porn being like a real serious movie and then the circumstances lead to porn, instead of there being no reason whatsoever for the girl to get naked and jump around stupidly. Have some kind of reason for it at least. Like how a lot of anime does it. They throw in porn every now and then instead of the porn being the only thing there.
As is probably 99% of the world. If there's an industry that will never die it's porn. Some industries are permanent. Transportaion, Food, Construction, health care, what else... well you get the point.
I was just thinking about it... as I was watching this gorgeous angel do her thang... it's just so easy now to get porn.
We had to earn that shit back in the day. Personally I kinda miss it. Specifically the 90s and its many quirks. Tv was a mixed bag back then, but the shows that were good, were fucking good, man. Tv now is horrible. Only thing good is the korra airbender show and that's not even half as good as the best shit from the 90s. So that right there tells you how much tv has declined as of late, and it's not necessarily tv's fault. It's 2 factors at work. The people who made great tv are getting older, and retiring. One can ask themself why there's no more classic looney tunes, well Mel blanc died. And god bless the man, he did bugs bunny up until the day his voice couldn't possibly do it any more. That's great. But the second factor is that the internet has become to many the new TV. It's evolving now, it's becoming a place where people are actually developing programs, sketches, cartoons and trying to take a bite out of tv. It's not bad. It's just it's losing that underground basement quality and becoming the corporate nightmare that is tv these days.
Nevermind that.... Getting back to porn though. I used to have to dig deep for porn. I mean, I literally took 3 years out of my life and drew tons of porn comics that I regret to this day having trashed because I loved what I accomplished. I have plans to redo the whole thing, but it's hard to come to terms with what it all means... what's the point? Have a big pile of porn and do what with it? I don't know whether I should even worry about the future, since I'm not going to be around to care anyway right? Just make the bloody thing and enjoy it while it lasts, thats all we can do...
I mean she deserves it. I designed and created my heart and soul on paper, I'll never just let her die. She'll always be a part of me, forever.
My point is however, the ease at which one can aquire porn is just disappointing to me now. You know how rare it was to find anal porn, or a porn that "looked" like anal from certain angles. You have to really loook back at porn and see that there was rarely any anal or if you got lucky the guy missed the pussy for a second and it went in the ass. Sometimes that happend and it was glorious.
I remember back in high school, that's when I first saw anal. I watched the FUCK out of that video. It was amazing. Now I look back on it and it's no where near the type of ass fucking you can find these days. But that's what I'm saying, there's so much of it now, it's become less special.
I guess things have escalated. Because there's hd right in your face porn of a bunch of girls taking dick in the ass, every porn has to have that now. It's like, "click" wonder what kind of porn this is going to be. Girl bends over and eats a dick with her ass hole. Oh, more anal.
ya know... for years butt sex was really considered extreme porn. Yes, back in the 90s even porn had limits. No beastiality, no anal, none of this extreme crazy shit we have now as the norm. And some porn was even shot like a real movie, so it was even more special when you actually gave a shit about the person being fucked.
Do I want to go back to that? Yeah sorta. I mean I'm no prude. I have a very flexible open mind. I'm like a really cool laid back dude, not a care in the world. So bring on the titties. Hell if I had it my way, I'd be cool with girls just walking around fucking naked, fuck it man... but you do lose something. If girls were naked all the time, finally getting to see them naked wouldn't be anything special. It's because we attempt to be civilized and shit, that it's so amazing to finally get a glimpse of a girl's naked sensitive body.
But I do believe it's lowering standards. Especially for girls. I can't imagine what girls these days are going through or what they're expected to do with the overwhelming amount of evidence to the contrary of whatever feminist ideals they hold. No woman can ever really take a stand on women being clean innocent princesses anymore. And it's their own fault anyway... *shrugs*
It's like, we're getting way too far of track. It's like, if society were to become like porn, what would actually "be" the porn after that? Just like how every porn started having anal in it, anal's getting boring, so there's now a lot of interracial all over the place, and DP and creampies. What's next?
I hope we get into more cinematic porn myself. Straight up porn is eventually going to get boring. I personally would love to have the next wave of porn being like a real serious movie and then the circumstances lead to porn, instead of there being no reason whatsoever for the girl to get naked and jump around stupidly. Have some kind of reason for it at least. Like how a lot of anime does it. They throw in porn every now and then instead of the porn being the only thing there.
zinc
wow cool. Didn't know zinc makes you sleep better.
nice. Now I can be free of my troubles. Ya see, sleep is probably the most important thing in your life. It's when your body heals and rests itself before the next day etc. When you don't get that shit? You fucked. You gonna feel like you half alive.
Been trying to fix my sleep for a while now. I'll be back with an update on the progress of this shit, see if it's truly working, because right now I'm so well rested and calm and cool in the head, I don't even want to jack off. Haven't felt like that in a long while...
ZINC BITCHES!!!
nice. Now I can be free of my troubles. Ya see, sleep is probably the most important thing in your life. It's when your body heals and rests itself before the next day etc. When you don't get that shit? You fucked. You gonna feel like you half alive.
Been trying to fix my sleep for a while now. I'll be back with an update on the progress of this shit, see if it's truly working, because right now I'm so well rested and calm and cool in the head, I don't even want to jack off. Haven't felt like that in a long while...
ZINC BITCHES!!!
Tuesday, December 25, 2012
Difficulties of the rapid minded
shit. I'm in a rut right now. I have mild ocd. I have to conclude that. Because right now my mind is completely obsessed with figuring out what some old tv interview I watched was about. It's so stupid. I know it's stupid. But yet it's killing me that I can't recall the full details of the show. I tell myself to "let it go" but it doesn't happen. i won't let it happen. I have the memory, it's just not coming to me.
That's what I do a lot. I think about stupid insignificant shit.
You all out there are living your lives, raising your children, going to parties, fucking. And I'm worried about remembering spiderman's theme music.
Some things i can't EVER get back, and although it hurts to have to leave those memories behind, I have to just take the bitter pill and move on from them. Like some girl I used to watch on youtube. I get the idea to go back to her channel and see what she's up to, and blasted I forgot the bitches name. Just like that, it's as if she never existed... and I feel terrible for failing to recall it.
I don't even know why. I've NEVER been a super smart guy. But one thing I pride myself on is my brain's speed. If I need to recall something, a feeling, an image, even a word's definition (I'm verbal oriented mind) this fucking thing has never failed me. It's why I can do what I do, be creative, whatever...
Like dr quest said, his excellent memory is both a blessing and a curse.
I remember almost everything in my life with vivid detail. And as much as I recall the good times, I also recall the bad. That's what he meant. Sometimes it's good not to be super smart, and over analyze things.
I'll dare say the good thing about being super smart is being rich. Being some kind of freak of nature genius with a superior iq or photo memory, must be hell if you want to relax yourself and get away from thinking about shit too much.
I say to myself. Forget the past. Think about the boobs and the future, maybe even finally getting laid. Yeah... would be nice. But I like things to be in order. I DO have OCD, just not a severe case of it. I mean, ultimately push comes to shove, I'll ditch the whole thing and move on. yes... but nothing better than a nice clean orderly, smooth, operation. Brings a smile to my face when things fit and work, and go well.
That's what I do a lot. I think about stupid insignificant shit.
You all out there are living your lives, raising your children, going to parties, fucking. And I'm worried about remembering spiderman's theme music.
Some things i can't EVER get back, and although it hurts to have to leave those memories behind, I have to just take the bitter pill and move on from them. Like some girl I used to watch on youtube. I get the idea to go back to her channel and see what she's up to, and blasted I forgot the bitches name. Just like that, it's as if she never existed... and I feel terrible for failing to recall it.
I don't even know why. I've NEVER been a super smart guy. But one thing I pride myself on is my brain's speed. If I need to recall something, a feeling, an image, even a word's definition (I'm verbal oriented mind) this fucking thing has never failed me. It's why I can do what I do, be creative, whatever...
Like dr quest said, his excellent memory is both a blessing and a curse.
I remember almost everything in my life with vivid detail. And as much as I recall the good times, I also recall the bad. That's what he meant. Sometimes it's good not to be super smart, and over analyze things.
I'll dare say the good thing about being super smart is being rich. Being some kind of freak of nature genius with a superior iq or photo memory, must be hell if you want to relax yourself and get away from thinking about shit too much.
I say to myself. Forget the past. Think about the boobs and the future, maybe even finally getting laid. Yeah... would be nice. But I like things to be in order. I DO have OCD, just not a severe case of it. I mean, ultimately push comes to shove, I'll ditch the whole thing and move on. yes... but nothing better than a nice clean orderly, smooth, operation. Brings a smile to my face when things fit and work, and go well.
Future of cinema
What the hobbit has done recently is going to change everything. I dare say we've witnessed a revolution in cinema on the same level as color and sound. I don't even want to watch regular movies anymore after seeing this motherfucker. That's how powerful an experience it was. I always wanted to see a movie that blurred the line between reality and fantasy so welll that you'd be hard pressed to figure out what was real or not. Well here it is. God damnit.
It was like being a kid again, like how you have all the time in the world to get lost in a cartoon episode. Or you use your imagination to make the show or movie real. Like how I watch the original ninja turtles movie as a kid. That shit was real to me. The characters, everything. I didn't even consider them puppets or sets or actors. It was TRUTH. Like the bible.
Hobbit's the shit. I want every movie to follow it now. I can't go back, I won't go back to regular frame rate. It's like having a choice between bluray and dvd. Which are you going to go with? Bravo, Peter Jackson.
It was like being a kid again, like how you have all the time in the world to get lost in a cartoon episode. Or you use your imagination to make the show or movie real. Like how I watch the original ninja turtles movie as a kid. That shit was real to me. The characters, everything. I didn't even consider them puppets or sets or actors. It was TRUTH. Like the bible.
Hobbit's the shit. I want every movie to follow it now. I can't go back, I won't go back to regular frame rate. It's like having a choice between bluray and dvd. Which are you going to go with? Bravo, Peter Jackson.
Monday, December 24, 2012
Kids again
wow, I'm shocked.
So I'm back from work. What an interesting thing, children.
I don't know, honestly. As a kid, I didn't think any of the other kids were even "kids" as in in toddlers...
I felt grown up quite a bit as a kid...
But I'm at work, and this little girl, probably 8 or something, just tells me she's getting her brother an angry birds plushy because he plays the game.
I'm all like "wow, you're real deal little girl." Just telling random people things...
ya know, me, the big goofy guy I am, just told her that she's "the best sister in the world."
I don't know. I'm the youngest in my family line. I've never had to be a big brother. So I don't know shit about that kind of thing. I've only ever really helped raise my niece, and I'm cool with her. ya know... she's really my daughter in a lot of ways. I wiped her ass. I'm there for her. Ya know... that's all it is. She's a bitch now that she's in her teens. And I try to maneuver around her bitchiness as much as possible.
But kids are killing me at work. I'm thinking, damn, that bitch is fine. Then she turns around and she's a child... I'm like whoa...
It's ok though. Ya know... I'll get used to it. I have to be a man about things. And what does that mean? I'll tell you. It means you always care about kids. ya know... All this job, college, war, shit, whatever... all comes down to one thing. Making a kid smile, laugh, be happy. Enjoy their life. Because it's gonna be over, man... And what scares me the most. What kinda pisses me off, is when I can't do enough. I can't help or entertain a little kid. Or I say something stupid or I fail at being impressive... ya know how it is... But I try. I want to give them the life I sorta had. Those moments as a child, when I was really happy, totally content. Whether it was watching cartoons, playing with toys, or like, dancing to music. That's exactly how I think kids should be, all the time. Not just those brief moments after school. But I'm just a little fish in a big pond. And I'm not going to change the world...
But yeah. That's what I try to do. I'll be damned, if I ever harm a kid. That's the bottom line for me.
So I'm back from work. What an interesting thing, children.
I don't know, honestly. As a kid, I didn't think any of the other kids were even "kids" as in in toddlers...
I felt grown up quite a bit as a kid...
But I'm at work, and this little girl, probably 8 or something, just tells me she's getting her brother an angry birds plushy because he plays the game.
I'm all like "wow, you're real deal little girl." Just telling random people things...
ya know, me, the big goofy guy I am, just told her that she's "the best sister in the world."
I don't know. I'm the youngest in my family line. I've never had to be a big brother. So I don't know shit about that kind of thing. I've only ever really helped raise my niece, and I'm cool with her. ya know... she's really my daughter in a lot of ways. I wiped her ass. I'm there for her. Ya know... that's all it is. She's a bitch now that she's in her teens. And I try to maneuver around her bitchiness as much as possible.
But kids are killing me at work. I'm thinking, damn, that bitch is fine. Then she turns around and she's a child... I'm like whoa...
It's ok though. Ya know... I'll get used to it. I have to be a man about things. And what does that mean? I'll tell you. It means you always care about kids. ya know... All this job, college, war, shit, whatever... all comes down to one thing. Making a kid smile, laugh, be happy. Enjoy their life. Because it's gonna be over, man... And what scares me the most. What kinda pisses me off, is when I can't do enough. I can't help or entertain a little kid. Or I say something stupid or I fail at being impressive... ya know how it is... But I try. I want to give them the life I sorta had. Those moments as a child, when I was really happy, totally content. Whether it was watching cartoons, playing with toys, or like, dancing to music. That's exactly how I think kids should be, all the time. Not just those brief moments after school. But I'm just a little fish in a big pond. And I'm not going to change the world...
But yeah. That's what I try to do. I'll be damned, if I ever harm a kid. That's the bottom line for me.
Sunday, December 23, 2012
alright gonna try flippin it
I've been taking a supplement called licorice root because it's supposed to increase your estrogen levels and ultimately lower your testosterone, so I'd stop being a horny fuck all the time. Can't be done. Shit's not possible to stop so what I'm going to do now is increase the testoterone. Get a more satisfying orgasm and maybe get better sleep out of it.
I figure Jerry Seinfeld is right. Maybe you just can't quit jackin it. Though it's so confining. I mean, certain things in life just are, yes. You have to piss, eat, sleep, and shit. There's no avoiding that. And maybe jackin it is part of the package. Who knows Who cares.
Zinc and I'm gonna get me some of those male enhancement pills that hopefully add more force to your semen shot.
Can't live like this. Dreaming of pussy. Not getting a good ass skeet anymore. I now know why people were so cheerful when I was a kid. They were fuckin and fuckin and fuckin and fuckin... yeah... such is life.
I figure Jerry Seinfeld is right. Maybe you just can't quit jackin it. Though it's so confining. I mean, certain things in life just are, yes. You have to piss, eat, sleep, and shit. There's no avoiding that. And maybe jackin it is part of the package. Who knows Who cares.
Zinc and I'm gonna get me some of those male enhancement pills that hopefully add more force to your semen shot.
Can't live like this. Dreaming of pussy. Not getting a good ass skeet anymore. I now know why people were so cheerful when I was a kid. They were fuckin and fuckin and fuckin and fuckin... yeah... such is life.
Saturday, December 22, 2012
Kids
So I'm back from work. God damn what a long day... work sucks but on the flip side, the girls working at a place like toys r us are gorgeous. It's not a bad thing at all to have to be amongst some cuties while doing a shitty job, that's for sure. Thank you whoever decided to let women work. I'm doing my thang, then I get an eye full of a good heap of nice ripe young cleavage bam in my face... Dick Hard.
Some chick named Ruby, typical dumbass young white girl, the kind I met often in my old high school in florida. Yes I said dumbass. Why? Because she's beautiful and those two often go hand in hand if a girl is good looking, she's typically a dumbass. And no surprise, this girl's just a hot dumbass white girl, like Lois lane. Spitting image. I wanted to grab her titties so bad. She's got big titties and a nice plump ass. And she's white. That's fucking impossible.
well anyway. I'm real happy right now. It's so stupid. I sent my bike motor back to Hi powered cycles. Then I'm waiting for the ups tracking to say "delivered" but nope. It says "wrong address, no delivery attempted" or something to that effect... I'm all like "omg" but I read on hi powered website that they moved their warehouse. Well fuck. So I update the shipping and surprise surprise, where they moved their business to is actually closer to the airport where the bike motor arrived. So that made things easier for ups in the long run. Not bad...
But I'm not satisfied. I'm very particular about things. So I directly communicate with them to see if they got the motor, but my true objective is to see if they will fix it in a jiffy or shelf it for later. They say they'll fix it. And even provide me with torque arms to prevent the wire from getting cut up again. God bless them. They may be goddamn scammers with their overpriced fucking bikes, but I'll be damned if they don't put out for their customers. That's good business. That's my business model. I don't want to hurt nobody. I want to do the right thing, provide good quality business. But that's not how any of these big corporations work. They're about building an impenetrable behemoth of an empire. Kings, Knights, Pawns. Chess on a worldwide scale. Big Brain mother fuckers doing what they do. But what about the people, the kids, is there no one who cares about them.
Saw some kids today. Woke me the fuck up. Ya know, i was a kid all my life. Why do I feel so put off by them. They shouldn't scare me, but they kinda do. I guess you have to live with a kid for a while to really not get too startled by them.
I treat kids like adults, myself. Why? Because I HATED being treated like a kid when I was younger. Not in the sense that people weren't being dicks to me, far from it. People beat and kicked me around all the time. But it's the attitude of calling me "little" and talking down to me like I'm retarded. That detested me. I was inexperienced, not stupid.
Saw this cute little bugger, eagerly awaiting his father to buy him a power rangers sword. I gotta say that took me back. My dad brought me to toys r us to get a game for my super nintendo and game boy. I just chatted with the kid like, man to man, about what he wanted for christmas. He was smart too. He pushed me to explain what I meant, so he could understand me fully. Fucking decent young man. I wish I could have him for a son.
Then come the girls. I don't know what to do around girls. All my life they've been a foreign subject, and they still are, though I do care for them. They're very whiny and bitchy. Sorry to say. But hot, gotta admit. I mean, they're not thinking they're bombshells yet, but I am. I'm like "daaamn, she's gonna be hot one day." in my head.
ahhh yep...
Some chick named Ruby, typical dumbass young white girl, the kind I met often in my old high school in florida. Yes I said dumbass. Why? Because she's beautiful and those two often go hand in hand if a girl is good looking, she's typically a dumbass. And no surprise, this girl's just a hot dumbass white girl, like Lois lane. Spitting image. I wanted to grab her titties so bad. She's got big titties and a nice plump ass. And she's white. That's fucking impossible.
well anyway. I'm real happy right now. It's so stupid. I sent my bike motor back to Hi powered cycles. Then I'm waiting for the ups tracking to say "delivered" but nope. It says "wrong address, no delivery attempted" or something to that effect... I'm all like "omg" but I read on hi powered website that they moved their warehouse. Well fuck. So I update the shipping and surprise surprise, where they moved their business to is actually closer to the airport where the bike motor arrived. So that made things easier for ups in the long run. Not bad...
But I'm not satisfied. I'm very particular about things. So I directly communicate with them to see if they got the motor, but my true objective is to see if they will fix it in a jiffy or shelf it for later. They say they'll fix it. And even provide me with torque arms to prevent the wire from getting cut up again. God bless them. They may be goddamn scammers with their overpriced fucking bikes, but I'll be damned if they don't put out for their customers. That's good business. That's my business model. I don't want to hurt nobody. I want to do the right thing, provide good quality business. But that's not how any of these big corporations work. They're about building an impenetrable behemoth of an empire. Kings, Knights, Pawns. Chess on a worldwide scale. Big Brain mother fuckers doing what they do. But what about the people, the kids, is there no one who cares about them.
Saw some kids today. Woke me the fuck up. Ya know, i was a kid all my life. Why do I feel so put off by them. They shouldn't scare me, but they kinda do. I guess you have to live with a kid for a while to really not get too startled by them.
I treat kids like adults, myself. Why? Because I HATED being treated like a kid when I was younger. Not in the sense that people weren't being dicks to me, far from it. People beat and kicked me around all the time. But it's the attitude of calling me "little" and talking down to me like I'm retarded. That detested me. I was inexperienced, not stupid.
Saw this cute little bugger, eagerly awaiting his father to buy him a power rangers sword. I gotta say that took me back. My dad brought me to toys r us to get a game for my super nintendo and game boy. I just chatted with the kid like, man to man, about what he wanted for christmas. He was smart too. He pushed me to explain what I meant, so he could understand me fully. Fucking decent young man. I wish I could have him for a son.
Then come the girls. I don't know what to do around girls. All my life they've been a foreign subject, and they still are, though I do care for them. They're very whiny and bitchy. Sorry to say. But hot, gotta admit. I mean, they're not thinking they're bombshells yet, but I am. I'm like "daaamn, she's gonna be hot one day." in my head.
ahhh yep...
Friday, December 21, 2012
The little everyday acts of ordinary folk
Gotta say something on this. I struggle with myself a lot. As we all must do. Whether you believe in it or not, something like the dark side or the light side, we struggle with it. Our capacity to do good and evil comes in equal measure.
So I watched the hobbit and what Gandalf says about why he chose bilbo I think is really great. He picked him because he was an ordinary good natured fellow. And he further claims that it is in the small acts of such people, their kindness, their simplistic good nature, that evil is held in check, moreso than with powerful armies etc.
I believe in that. You know above all else in my life what keeps me sane amidst the terrors of this world, it's remembering that as a child there was this old man who lived next door to us. He was so nice to us, made balloon animals for us. That's what does it, ya know. Keeps me believing life is worth a damn. I don't care if I ever really accomplish anything significant, but I'll be damned if I let the world fully corrupt me and make me stop believing in people's good side. God damned...
So I watched the hobbit and what Gandalf says about why he chose bilbo I think is really great. He picked him because he was an ordinary good natured fellow. And he further claims that it is in the small acts of such people, their kindness, their simplistic good nature, that evil is held in check, moreso than with powerful armies etc.
I believe in that. You know above all else in my life what keeps me sane amidst the terrors of this world, it's remembering that as a child there was this old man who lived next door to us. He was so nice to us, made balloon animals for us. That's what does it, ya know. Keeps me believing life is worth a damn. I don't care if I ever really accomplish anything significant, but I'll be damned if I let the world fully corrupt me and make me stop believing in people's good side. God damned...
so damn hard
I have to give it up to testosterone. It's a bitch. I take the licorice root shit, and it works, ya know, it kinda smooths things out so you're not too horny and shit. But then i have to fuck it up. Why can't I just chill yo... just chill..
Fittin to go get me some beers and just party tonight. I like to play tron music, and get drunk. Gotta go to work tomorrow, whatever...
Uh, yeah ya knoww... just livin man.
Fittin to go get me some beers and just party tonight. I like to play tron music, and get drunk. Gotta go to work tomorrow, whatever...
Uh, yeah ya knoww... just livin man.
Thursday, December 20, 2012
A man a woman needs
So I'm going to try to kill my libido. I don't need or want it honestly. I'm going to die some day, can't do anything about that, but I'm not too inclined to live up to that point feeling constantly horny. I want to fuck a girl so bad, it's ridiculous. I want to go back to the way things were before all this. I was content enough. I watched cartoons, I played with my super nintendo. Life was decent.
Kids, bah. I know, having kids makes a man into a man all that hubbub. Very nice indeed, but I'm not interested, thank you very much.
Makes me wonder though. Seeing all these girls of all races predictably turning away from some repetitive dull job in exchange for their primariy objective which is to of course bear children. What kind of man do they want. I'll tell you this from my experience. They don't want just any guy. Even those kkk girls. A strong alpha male is strong alpha male. No matter his outward appearance. I could get a white girl if I wished, much to the chagrin of white fathers. I have no fear of that, not a bit. They all respond to a strong bad boy personality and the muscles, or a strong intellect. Display those qualities and she's yours to fuck in every hole she's got. sad really... but tantalizing. The urge is strong in me to fill a bitch with semen...
I must resist. And I don't want any part of this crazy world anyway. I've had a bad run. Why continue it... makes no sense to me.
Go on, have your fun. I'll do what I always do. Sit in a corner and watch you fools pitter patter about.
Kids, bah. I know, having kids makes a man into a man all that hubbub. Very nice indeed, but I'm not interested, thank you very much.
Makes me wonder though. Seeing all these girls of all races predictably turning away from some repetitive dull job in exchange for their primariy objective which is to of course bear children. What kind of man do they want. I'll tell you this from my experience. They don't want just any guy. Even those kkk girls. A strong alpha male is strong alpha male. No matter his outward appearance. I could get a white girl if I wished, much to the chagrin of white fathers. I have no fear of that, not a bit. They all respond to a strong bad boy personality and the muscles, or a strong intellect. Display those qualities and she's yours to fuck in every hole she's got. sad really... but tantalizing. The urge is strong in me to fill a bitch with semen...
I must resist. And I don't want any part of this crazy world anyway. I've had a bad run. Why continue it... makes no sense to me.
Go on, have your fun. I'll do what I always do. Sit in a corner and watch you fools pitter patter about.
Saturday, December 15, 2012
torque arm
heh, so that's what that thing does...
Looks like I just needed a torque arm to prevent the back wheel from rotating. Oh crap...
So a bunch of kids got shot while learning their abc's. I wish the gunman didn't kill himself because I would make him live the rest of his life without a dick, or arms or legs, or something like that.
Kids shouldn't be thrust into the hectic, ruthless, savage real world we live in, not like that. That's all I got to say. I suppose there's going to be a lot of questioning "why" would God allow children to die so horribly. I don't know.... Maybe it's not his doing, but ours. We're the monsters, and we continue to abandon his teachings, that's for sure.
Yet I get to live, huh... I don't understand....
Looks like I just needed a torque arm to prevent the back wheel from rotating. Oh crap...
So a bunch of kids got shot while learning their abc's. I wish the gunman didn't kill himself because I would make him live the rest of his life without a dick, or arms or legs, or something like that.
Kids shouldn't be thrust into the hectic, ruthless, savage real world we live in, not like that. That's all I got to say. I suppose there's going to be a lot of questioning "why" would God allow children to die so horribly. I don't know.... Maybe it's not his doing, but ours. We're the monsters, and we continue to abandon his teachings, that's for sure.
Yet I get to live, huh... I don't understand....
Thursday, December 13, 2012
well shit
that was faster than expected...
The bike is now nothing more than a big pile of expensive shit.
Broke the wire coming out of the motor due to my own ignorance of how to properly string it around the bike to the controller. Lesson learned, It's critical to keep that wire from getting damaged by any means necessary.
The motor's good, but without those wires being connected, it can't get the juice to work properly.
But I'm not totally emo cut wrists sad about it. I'm just so goddamn aggravated after working so hard to get it all together.
Talkin to hi powered cycles now about what to do. It's all technically under warranty, so I should be within my rights to send it back and get it fixed, which I will do if necessary. Now, I'm thinking maybe I can rig the wires myself and fix them in some slapdash fashion, but who knows if that'll work. The damage is such that there's very little I can do about it. Oy vey...
I might just say to hell with it and get a electric moped fully assembled. Like I told myself when building this bike, something's going to go wrong. And it did. Though not what I expected. I thought the motor wouldn't work, it did. I thought the battery wouldn't juice up the shit, it did. Throttle works... only thing that's off is the motor's little wires which got ripped up because of the back wheel spinning and pulling the cord. So now I'm fucked. And have to get that shit fixed... what a day...
Gottta go to work tomorrow too, so now I got to deal with that shit. Hope I can just get this problem solved and move on... god willing...
The bike is now nothing more than a big pile of expensive shit.
Broke the wire coming out of the motor due to my own ignorance of how to properly string it around the bike to the controller. Lesson learned, It's critical to keep that wire from getting damaged by any means necessary.
The motor's good, but without those wires being connected, it can't get the juice to work properly.
But I'm not totally emo cut wrists sad about it. I'm just so goddamn aggravated after working so hard to get it all together.
Talkin to hi powered cycles now about what to do. It's all technically under warranty, so I should be within my rights to send it back and get it fixed, which I will do if necessary. Now, I'm thinking maybe I can rig the wires myself and fix them in some slapdash fashion, but who knows if that'll work. The damage is such that there's very little I can do about it. Oy vey...
I might just say to hell with it and get a electric moped fully assembled. Like I told myself when building this bike, something's going to go wrong. And it did. Though not what I expected. I thought the motor wouldn't work, it did. I thought the battery wouldn't juice up the shit, it did. Throttle works... only thing that's off is the motor's little wires which got ripped up because of the back wheel spinning and pulling the cord. So now I'm fucked. And have to get that shit fixed... what a day...
Gottta go to work tomorrow too, so now I got to deal with that shit. Hope I can just get this problem solved and move on... god willing...
Wednesday, December 12, 2012
progress on bike
9.47 pm. Everything seems to be going well.
I will be testing the bike tomorrow as soon as the battery fully charges. And hopefully it works... One of the most troublesome parts of this kind of stuff, electronics, engineering, which I enjoy... is the first test. Because sometimes after all the blood sweat and tears of putting the components together, drilling the holes, tightening bolts, you turn the damn thing on and it doesn't work.
Uh... but I've always never given up on something that's just not working. I fucking keep on trying to mess around with it until it does. Similarly to the computer I fixed. And like the hard drive I had to clone. I couldn't find damn piece of software to do it with, but ultimately my persistence in trying to goddamn find something that works, lead to a program that did the job no problem. It's all part of the learning process we all go through as nerdy computer geeks. Computers and electronics and all these mechanical disciplines are a goddamn battlefield and you learn as you go, but also utilize the knowledge of those who've come before and made the same discoveries and mistakes.
Still I'm incredibly excited. I feel like a kid again at christmas. ya know how you get a new toy and can't wait to play with it, that kind of thing.
It's striking to me though how bad I've had it with these kind of things. I've spent upwards of 3000 dollars on two different electric bikes, both with their respective strengths and weaknesses and both have been stolen and raped for parts by some crack heads. I've never thought I'd live to see such a thing go down, but overall I'm still crazily optimistic. This bike is better, more powerful, will ultimately save me more money because I won't spend shit on getting to work and back again. The only thing I have to do is make sure it's not stolen by any means necessary.
Tomorrow you're going to see some serious shit... gonna do a video of my bike and everything. Just need that battery to charge!!!!
I will be testing the bike tomorrow as soon as the battery fully charges. And hopefully it works... One of the most troublesome parts of this kind of stuff, electronics, engineering, which I enjoy... is the first test. Because sometimes after all the blood sweat and tears of putting the components together, drilling the holes, tightening bolts, you turn the damn thing on and it doesn't work.
Uh... but I've always never given up on something that's just not working. I fucking keep on trying to mess around with it until it does. Similarly to the computer I fixed. And like the hard drive I had to clone. I couldn't find damn piece of software to do it with, but ultimately my persistence in trying to goddamn find something that works, lead to a program that did the job no problem. It's all part of the learning process we all go through as nerdy computer geeks. Computers and electronics and all these mechanical disciplines are a goddamn battlefield and you learn as you go, but also utilize the knowledge of those who've come before and made the same discoveries and mistakes.
Still I'm incredibly excited. I feel like a kid again at christmas. ya know how you get a new toy and can't wait to play with it, that kind of thing.
It's striking to me though how bad I've had it with these kind of things. I've spent upwards of 3000 dollars on two different electric bikes, both with their respective strengths and weaknesses and both have been stolen and raped for parts by some crack heads. I've never thought I'd live to see such a thing go down, but overall I'm still crazily optimistic. This bike is better, more powerful, will ultimately save me more money because I won't spend shit on getting to work and back again. The only thing I have to do is make sure it's not stolen by any means necessary.
Tomorrow you're going to see some serious shit... gonna do a video of my bike and everything. Just need that battery to charge!!!!
Monday, December 10, 2012
thoughts on bullies
Yeah hardy har har, I guess my antics at superherohype influenced the captain america movie. Very nice. And avatar, the whole "go away" meltdown...
Stop it. I don't want to be a part of some screen writer's jokes.
I grew up having NOTHING to do with big mainstream hollywood and I would much prefer to live and die that way. Though it is flattering. As I sat at my desk as a kid drawing and dreaming of star wars and ghost busters, I did have this thought that maybe someday I'd get to do something great like lucas and my other idols. Not going to happen, but hey, I made my mark in some way didn't I...
But getting back to captain america, he goes on about how he despises bullies because he was seriously picked on as a weakling before getting the roids...
I got picked on incessantly in school. Every year I'd have to deal with some asshole guy. On and on it went...I ultimately got into a fight with some douche in high school before leaving the school for good after that.
Now it continues in life, at work, online, assholes all over the place though I could care less. I'm much wiser now. I know how things are, but that still doesn't make me feel very optimistic.
I simply wish it didn't ever happen. And now I'm getting made out to be the bad guy because I'm not a bully myself. Well, no i don't want to be. I've played that role, I've retaliated against my cat I didn't like. I've bullied my sister for fun when bored. I KNOW it's fun to pick on others. Which is why I strive not to do it, and be a hero. And not out of some "oh I'm older, and have to act like an adult" reason. I'm just not a bad person. Believe it or not, there are people in this world like me who are good people. We have no desire to destroy others. We want to be a force for good.
It makes me feel good to help kids. To help people. I genuinely enjoy it. Why is that so wrong? If I see any kid in trouble or hurt, doesn't matter if that kid's an asshole, I'll most likely help him. That's just who I am.
I'm a soldier I guess, born from the same warrior blood as my father. Warriors are supposed to defend people, like jedi. Or I hope so anyway, can't say I agree with what we're doing military wise, but I don't know much about that shit.
All I really want to do now is get some pussy. Ya know what I don't get. Why do kids bully the crap out of you all your life, then when they discover this thing called the female, they're all like "You're such an immature guy, grow up..." Hello, dude, I've always been grown up, you just finally stepped up to my level.
Sigh... Anyway, I love women. I just realized that now, they're goddamn beautiful things to me. Makes me almost forget how much shit I've been through. But yeah, they're like a perfect work of art. I've seen great works of art, yet nothing compares to a female body in its prime form. Why is that? It seems so simplistic to be completely fucking overjoyed by the sight of a gorgeous girl. But that's just the way it is. I see a hot babe and I'm thinking "life is good." It shouldn't be that easy. Something's wrong with that...
Really though, it's about that bond you develop. The superficial is good too, but the deep emotional bond to a woman is where the good shit is... I mean, I'd love to get with a gorgeous blonde big tittied blue eyed white girl, but if she's a psycho bitch I can only tolerate her for so long, ya know... It's not about that. It's about having a girl with you who you can play a session of call of duty with and she sucks your dick if you win, that kind of shit.
soul mates. I gotta get me some of that before I fuck off this planet yall...
Stop it. I don't want to be a part of some screen writer's jokes.
I grew up having NOTHING to do with big mainstream hollywood and I would much prefer to live and die that way. Though it is flattering. As I sat at my desk as a kid drawing and dreaming of star wars and ghost busters, I did have this thought that maybe someday I'd get to do something great like lucas and my other idols. Not going to happen, but hey, I made my mark in some way didn't I...
But getting back to captain america, he goes on about how he despises bullies because he was seriously picked on as a weakling before getting the roids...
I got picked on incessantly in school. Every year I'd have to deal with some asshole guy. On and on it went...I ultimately got into a fight with some douche in high school before leaving the school for good after that.
Now it continues in life, at work, online, assholes all over the place though I could care less. I'm much wiser now. I know how things are, but that still doesn't make me feel very optimistic.
I simply wish it didn't ever happen. And now I'm getting made out to be the bad guy because I'm not a bully myself. Well, no i don't want to be. I've played that role, I've retaliated against my cat I didn't like. I've bullied my sister for fun when bored. I KNOW it's fun to pick on others. Which is why I strive not to do it, and be a hero. And not out of some "oh I'm older, and have to act like an adult" reason. I'm just not a bad person. Believe it or not, there are people in this world like me who are good people. We have no desire to destroy others. We want to be a force for good.
It makes me feel good to help kids. To help people. I genuinely enjoy it. Why is that so wrong? If I see any kid in trouble or hurt, doesn't matter if that kid's an asshole, I'll most likely help him. That's just who I am.
I'm a soldier I guess, born from the same warrior blood as my father. Warriors are supposed to defend people, like jedi. Or I hope so anyway, can't say I agree with what we're doing military wise, but I don't know much about that shit.
All I really want to do now is get some pussy. Ya know what I don't get. Why do kids bully the crap out of you all your life, then when they discover this thing called the female, they're all like "You're such an immature guy, grow up..." Hello, dude, I've always been grown up, you just finally stepped up to my level.
Sigh... Anyway, I love women. I just realized that now, they're goddamn beautiful things to me. Makes me almost forget how much shit I've been through. But yeah, they're like a perfect work of art. I've seen great works of art, yet nothing compares to a female body in its prime form. Why is that? It seems so simplistic to be completely fucking overjoyed by the sight of a gorgeous girl. But that's just the way it is. I see a hot babe and I'm thinking "life is good." It shouldn't be that easy. Something's wrong with that...
Really though, it's about that bond you develop. The superficial is good too, but the deep emotional bond to a woman is where the good shit is... I mean, I'd love to get with a gorgeous blonde big tittied blue eyed white girl, but if she's a psycho bitch I can only tolerate her for so long, ya know... It's not about that. It's about having a girl with you who you can play a session of call of duty with and she sucks your dick if you win, that kind of shit.
soul mates. I gotta get me some of that before I fuck off this planet yall...
Saturday, December 8, 2012
Future of personal transport devices
I'm currently in the process of building a second electric bike, this time with more power, 2000w motor, and a diagnostic computer to allow me to see exactly how much power is left in the battery, a supposedly top of the line new type called linmc.
With that in mind, I've also been thinking about the future of small electronic vehicles. We're developing better solar panels that can store more energy. Why not create a solar electric bike or scooter?
The problem with solar cars is that there's no way to capture enough energy with the solar panels to fully refuel the battery to power a car of such a size. But with a bike, there's no problem since size and weight is far less of an issue.
Check out other people's shit:
Here you see the potential benefits of solar powered transport. One day I think this can revolutionize the world of personal and affordable transportation.
With that in mind, I've also been thinking about the future of small electronic vehicles. We're developing better solar panels that can store more energy. Why not create a solar electric bike or scooter?
The problem with solar cars is that there's no way to capture enough energy with the solar panels to fully refuel the battery to power a car of such a size. But with a bike, there's no problem since size and weight is far less of an issue.
Check out other people's shit:
Here you see the potential benefits of solar powered transport. One day I think this can revolutionize the world of personal and affordable transportation.
Friday, December 7, 2012
Faggots
I'm reeeeeally tired of these people.
They can piss the hell off, get the fuck off my planet earth. Shit.
I was just thinking about it... It's hard being me. I'm like 26 and shit, it's lame. I'm still a virgin. And yet people think I've fucked 50 girls by now. There's people in grade school who have fucked more than me, yet I'm the guy who could be out in Iraq shooting sand niggers for the government.
It's not weakness to yearn for the ignorance of childhood in which I knew nothing about fags. It's sanity. Gays are insane, they're backwards people. I find it difficult to want to defend their rights and shit because every part of me and who I was raised to be says that whole thing is wrong to the core.
I first learned about gays in around 3rd grade. Some douche bag named douglas, fat black kid, was obsessed with gays. All the dumbass would talk about. I kept thinking, get over it. Nobody in here is gay, why do you keep bringing it up, hell no one here even knows anything about sex, why do you keep bringing it up... but he's a complete idiot so of course he goes on and on about something he knows nothing about.
Little did I know, that a little childhood insult was a huge political topic, and a reputation killer if someone even hinted you were gay in the public eye. We aren't as mature as we hope to present ourselves to be...
The world is just made up of a bunch of kids with sex drives...
So yeah, I wish I could turn back time and become the same person I was before I knew about the whole gay thing. Life was better when I thought, everyone's normal like me. Sure I was black, but I had no problem with that. I was going to be fucking bitches up a storm, so what... Then the one thing black people love to screw each other over with came into my life, the whole "you're a fag" insult. And to my damn shock, it's also the main insult EVERYWHERE. Military, work, school, jail, wherever... It's not "oh you're so dumb." "oh you're a nigger." "oh you have no life." "oh you're geek." In fact, I think that's the reason geeks are getting less pissed on lately... just watch all those shows in the 90s, it's jocks vs geeks. Nowadays, it's girls and gays being the outcasts. Times change.
Indeed they do, but not that much. I don't think it's going to last this whole gay acceptance movement. Really ask yourself how pliable humanity is. Just as I very much doubt a bunch of white parents want to open their neighborhood to the ghetto-est douche baggiest niggers the world has ever seen, I very much doubt there will be an overwhelming acceptance of homosexuality.
Wouldn't it be funny to live in a world in which every movie was like brokeback mountain and then there were a rare few hetero themed films? That'd be a fucked up world...
Hey kids, lets go to disney world!
YAAAY DADDY, I WANT TO GO TO THE PIXAR MOVIE JACK AND BILL !
OH YEAH AND I WANT TO PLAY THAT GAME, WHIP MY BUNS
NO FAIR... I WANT TO GET CREAM IN MY MOUTH FIRST AT THE HARD COCK CAFE.
i mean come on...
They can piss the hell off, get the fuck off my planet earth. Shit.
I was just thinking about it... It's hard being me. I'm like 26 and shit, it's lame. I'm still a virgin. And yet people think I've fucked 50 girls by now. There's people in grade school who have fucked more than me, yet I'm the guy who could be out in Iraq shooting sand niggers for the government.
It's not weakness to yearn for the ignorance of childhood in which I knew nothing about fags. It's sanity. Gays are insane, they're backwards people. I find it difficult to want to defend their rights and shit because every part of me and who I was raised to be says that whole thing is wrong to the core.
I first learned about gays in around 3rd grade. Some douche bag named douglas, fat black kid, was obsessed with gays. All the dumbass would talk about. I kept thinking, get over it. Nobody in here is gay, why do you keep bringing it up, hell no one here even knows anything about sex, why do you keep bringing it up... but he's a complete idiot so of course he goes on and on about something he knows nothing about.
Little did I know, that a little childhood insult was a huge political topic, and a reputation killer if someone even hinted you were gay in the public eye. We aren't as mature as we hope to present ourselves to be...
The world is just made up of a bunch of kids with sex drives...
So yeah, I wish I could turn back time and become the same person I was before I knew about the whole gay thing. Life was better when I thought, everyone's normal like me. Sure I was black, but I had no problem with that. I was going to be fucking bitches up a storm, so what... Then the one thing black people love to screw each other over with came into my life, the whole "you're a fag" insult. And to my damn shock, it's also the main insult EVERYWHERE. Military, work, school, jail, wherever... It's not "oh you're so dumb." "oh you're a nigger." "oh you have no life." "oh you're geek." In fact, I think that's the reason geeks are getting less pissed on lately... just watch all those shows in the 90s, it's jocks vs geeks. Nowadays, it's girls and gays being the outcasts. Times change.
Indeed they do, but not that much. I don't think it's going to last this whole gay acceptance movement. Really ask yourself how pliable humanity is. Just as I very much doubt a bunch of white parents want to open their neighborhood to the ghetto-est douche baggiest niggers the world has ever seen, I very much doubt there will be an overwhelming acceptance of homosexuality.
Wouldn't it be funny to live in a world in which every movie was like brokeback mountain and then there were a rare few hetero themed films? That'd be a fucked up world...
Hey kids, lets go to disney world!
YAAAY DADDY, I WANT TO GO TO THE PIXAR MOVIE JACK AND BILL !
OH YEAH AND I WANT TO PLAY THAT GAME, WHIP MY BUNS
NO FAIR... I WANT TO GET CREAM IN MY MOUTH FIRST AT THE HARD COCK CAFE.
i mean come on...
Thursday, December 6, 2012
Niggers
Getting tired of these people. I'm glad I'm not dealing with black kids on a daily basis anymore. That was tough enough, being a public school teacher or whatever must be hell on earth if someone decided to try it. They don't give a fuck, these guys.
I wouldn't hesitate to drop them off a cliff and laugh as they fall to their deaths. I don't care about them. I really seriously don't.
I'm going to mcdonalds, a bunch of bike riding douche niggers are accosting me for a fucking dime. As if just asking random people for money is going to make them give it to you.
I'm riding my bike to target, some nigger yells "that nigga rollin" Well fuck, I guess you have functioning eyes...
What else, I'm on the b-ball court, some little kid nigger starts trying to talk trash to me about how I must be embarrassed to have been beaten by a kid. You accomplished a lot with your life, haven't you, dumb fuck.
No wonder white people can't stand us. It's exhausting, and depressing, to realize how impossible it is to make black people look good to the world when so many would prefer to act a fool.
No one cares if you put down the watermelon and fried chicken and crack a book every once in a while, fellas. It's ok these days to step outside the blackness stereotypes and pursue greater intellectual heights.
Fuck.
I wouldn't hesitate to drop them off a cliff and laugh as they fall to their deaths. I don't care about them. I really seriously don't.
I'm going to mcdonalds, a bunch of bike riding douche niggers are accosting me for a fucking dime. As if just asking random people for money is going to make them give it to you.
I'm riding my bike to target, some nigger yells "that nigga rollin" Well fuck, I guess you have functioning eyes...
What else, I'm on the b-ball court, some little kid nigger starts trying to talk trash to me about how I must be embarrassed to have been beaten by a kid. You accomplished a lot with your life, haven't you, dumb fuck.
No wonder white people can't stand us. It's exhausting, and depressing, to realize how impossible it is to make black people look good to the world when so many would prefer to act a fool.
No one cares if you put down the watermelon and fried chicken and crack a book every once in a while, fellas. It's ok these days to step outside the blackness stereotypes and pursue greater intellectual heights.
Fuck.
Tuesday, December 4, 2012
What is a woman?
I work at toys r us, at least I try to. I've been the one going to them most of the time to get started for work. They never call me in, but I don't mind, as long as I'm getting busy and not doing nothing.
So it's a toy store, the majority of the customers are parents and their kids. I see them more now than I did working at my other jobs.
So this lady comes in with her daughter and they're looking for everything and anything angry birds. I guess that shit is the new pokemon. Actually beyblades is the new fad on the block with kids. You're going to get beat up if you don't have the latest bey blade, son. Good lawd, I can't believe the shit nerdy kids value... but alas I was a huge pokemon and yoyo guy myself so I can't blame them.
Anyway I'm no pedo or anything but I do acknowledge that the little girl's going to be the most popular girl in her class once she sprouts, that's for sure. It's kinda crazy, but yeah I couldn't help but imagine what she's going to look like later after fucking childhood is over. Gets me thinking too about what the hell happens in a woman's brain when she ya know gets a pair of tits and plump ass and her child self who was so cute and innocent is lost forever. What is it about a woman that I want to touch and squeeze so much and fuck till the sun goes down.
I shouldn't think about it, it's just nature taking its course, but I do want to know. I don't like blindly walking into anything. I can't understand it, so I don't particularly feel its right to do it, to be so infatuated with titties and ass and pussy like I am. Is it the soft warm feel of a titty and ass cheek that's so alluring? Is it the milk from the titties and how good it would taste that is attracting? Now of course just seeing a freaking gorgeous woman from across the room, nice curves, cute face, big titties, is enough to cause a boner. Even if she's like still like a kid too, you can imagine what's coming down the line and from that you get attracted, not at her little kid self. Lest I be labeled a pedo, I became attracted to girls in 8th grade, on the dot.
I had no interest in them sexually until that point. And nothing's changed, the same physical features that girls start to develope in that time, more curvacious hips and legs, budding breasts, fuller softer bodies, all still get my blood boiling. So if I see it and it's hot, I enjoy the view, yes even if it's a some very young chick, doesn't change how I feel towards a pair of tits, ok. But I know how the world works and everyone is very serious about pedophilia out there, you say word one about being attracted to some big tittied hot bitch who's under 18 and you're fucked.
Girls fascinate me though. That girl doesn't even know what she's got yet. She's just a kid, playing kid games, doing kid stuff, bla bla bla, but when she gets those curves, it's a wrap. She'll have more power and confidence in herself because she's so goddamn hot, it's going to be a crazy.
I made her smile when she was leaving the store, that's the second time I've made a little girl smile, the other was on the bus. Why do I like to do that? I guess it's a paternal thing, I want to let her know it's ok. Life's not so bad at all. And of course there's much to be enjoyed about it. She looked so scared and shit like kids do sometimes because they're new to the world, but me personally I like to let kids know there's nothing to be afraid of... You're fucking hot. You're going to get anything you goddamn want, babe... be yourself, have fun, it's your world. fall down, get back up. explore, make choices. etc. And ultimately get goddamn laid.
So it's a toy store, the majority of the customers are parents and their kids. I see them more now than I did working at my other jobs.
So this lady comes in with her daughter and they're looking for everything and anything angry birds. I guess that shit is the new pokemon. Actually beyblades is the new fad on the block with kids. You're going to get beat up if you don't have the latest bey blade, son. Good lawd, I can't believe the shit nerdy kids value... but alas I was a huge pokemon and yoyo guy myself so I can't blame them.
Anyway I'm no pedo or anything but I do acknowledge that the little girl's going to be the most popular girl in her class once she sprouts, that's for sure. It's kinda crazy, but yeah I couldn't help but imagine what she's going to look like later after fucking childhood is over. Gets me thinking too about what the hell happens in a woman's brain when she ya know gets a pair of tits and plump ass and her child self who was so cute and innocent is lost forever. What is it about a woman that I want to touch and squeeze so much and fuck till the sun goes down.
I shouldn't think about it, it's just nature taking its course, but I do want to know. I don't like blindly walking into anything. I can't understand it, so I don't particularly feel its right to do it, to be so infatuated with titties and ass and pussy like I am. Is it the soft warm feel of a titty and ass cheek that's so alluring? Is it the milk from the titties and how good it would taste that is attracting? Now of course just seeing a freaking gorgeous woman from across the room, nice curves, cute face, big titties, is enough to cause a boner. Even if she's like still like a kid too, you can imagine what's coming down the line and from that you get attracted, not at her little kid self. Lest I be labeled a pedo, I became attracted to girls in 8th grade, on the dot.
I had no interest in them sexually until that point. And nothing's changed, the same physical features that girls start to develope in that time, more curvacious hips and legs, budding breasts, fuller softer bodies, all still get my blood boiling. So if I see it and it's hot, I enjoy the view, yes even if it's a some very young chick, doesn't change how I feel towards a pair of tits, ok. But I know how the world works and everyone is very serious about pedophilia out there, you say word one about being attracted to some big tittied hot bitch who's under 18 and you're fucked.
Girls fascinate me though. That girl doesn't even know what she's got yet. She's just a kid, playing kid games, doing kid stuff, bla bla bla, but when she gets those curves, it's a wrap. She'll have more power and confidence in herself because she's so goddamn hot, it's going to be a crazy.
I made her smile when she was leaving the store, that's the second time I've made a little girl smile, the other was on the bus. Why do I like to do that? I guess it's a paternal thing, I want to let her know it's ok. Life's not so bad at all. And of course there's much to be enjoyed about it. She looked so scared and shit like kids do sometimes because they're new to the world, but me personally I like to let kids know there's nothing to be afraid of... You're fucking hot. You're going to get anything you goddamn want, babe... be yourself, have fun, it's your world. fall down, get back up. explore, make choices. etc. And ultimately get goddamn laid.
Saturday, December 1, 2012
I'm a loser huh
No, the world's a loser.
I'm angry right now.
I'm tired of this stuff... Like ya know, when I say I don't like how women are these days and some think, well deal with it. No.
I'm a good guy. I don't deserve to be treated like no criminal. I never hurt no one as much as some do.
I feel like I'm being hounded by some motherfuckers all the time as if they'll never get over the past. I certainly will. I'm going to have a bright future.
I'm going to get in the best shape of my life.
I'm going to get some hot girlfriend.
I'm going to love her, and potentially my daughter or son.
I'm going to perhaps get into the medical field and be the guy who saves a life where others would rather take it.
FUCK YOU IF YOU DON'T LIKE ME.
I'm here on this earth to be the hero, I've always known it. THAT is my purpose in life, assholes...
I'm angry right now.
I'm tired of this stuff... Like ya know, when I say I don't like how women are these days and some think, well deal with it. No.
I'm a good guy. I don't deserve to be treated like no criminal. I never hurt no one as much as some do.
I feel like I'm being hounded by some motherfuckers all the time as if they'll never get over the past. I certainly will. I'm going to have a bright future.
I'm going to get in the best shape of my life.
I'm going to get some hot girlfriend.
I'm going to love her, and potentially my daughter or son.
I'm going to perhaps get into the medical field and be the guy who saves a life where others would rather take it.
FUCK YOU IF YOU DON'T LIKE ME.
I'm here on this earth to be the hero, I've always known it. THAT is my purpose in life, assholes...
Black white girls
Ever seen one of these girls? I watch porn all day... So I've seen a lot of women of all kinds. Needless to say us black people just like in life do not make up the majority of the porn industry, for obvious reasons. Good looking black people are a rarity. Whites have always been the most sought after porn stars and therefore have created this false sense that the only hot girls are big tittied curvacious white women, couldn't be more wrong, but alas, no big deal. asian women and latinas are the best.
But there's this phenomenon I'm coming across as I continue my journey through the world of pornography. Not all white girls are hot. Some of them are what we call "butterfaces" everything else is good, but then her face is off to some degree. Like gianna Michaels for instance.
I think then that she could be considered black now because of her disadvantages. To elaborate, what I mean is that she's white but not white enough to be amongst her peers. She's like the ugly duckling or the runt of the litter. She's on my level ya know. She's black white girl, basically a white girl who's like a super hot black chick.
There's another side of the tracks. A black girl who by all measures is disadvantaged in this world b being born black, yet is unbelievably gorgeous. Like... tyra banks or whoever. Some black girls get lucky. If you've ever seen black porn stars who are the most popular, they're basically just blacks with some white blood spilled in there somewhere, so they came out the pussy looking ridiculously hot. So the white girl who's a butterface and the black girl who's drop dead gorgeous are practically on the same level in my mind.
But there's this phenomenon I'm coming across as I continue my journey through the world of pornography. Not all white girls are hot. Some of them are what we call "butterfaces" everything else is good, but then her face is off to some degree. Like gianna Michaels for instance.
I think then that she could be considered black now because of her disadvantages. To elaborate, what I mean is that she's white but not white enough to be amongst her peers. She's like the ugly duckling or the runt of the litter. She's on my level ya know. She's black white girl, basically a white girl who's like a super hot black chick.
There's another side of the tracks. A black girl who by all measures is disadvantaged in this world b being born black, yet is unbelievably gorgeous. Like... tyra banks or whoever. Some black girls get lucky. If you've ever seen black porn stars who are the most popular, they're basically just blacks with some white blood spilled in there somewhere, so they came out the pussy looking ridiculously hot. So the white girl who's a butterface and the black girl who's drop dead gorgeous are practically on the same level in my mind.
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