considerations on levels of professionalism

Something that interests me as an artistic person. I mean It's hard to simply denominate myself as an artist. I take umbrage to that honestly because it doesn't really make much sense to me. If I'm an artist, why aren't I doing it as a career. Why am I just simply an artist because I have artistic capability? Why not actually make money off of it. How does one truly define artist, really? Is it about simply having the skills or is it because it's an actual job.

I mean is it about having the potential to be an artist and that's all it is. I mean it's like sure, I've been into the art stuff all my life. And I'm still into it even post puberty. I'm more and more fascinated by the world of art. Some people dedicate their lives to it. And some even say there's nothing else.

I mean despite all our various racial differences. Very smart people tend to show an appreciation for other smart people. I mean not even smart in the sense that you did very well in school. I mean the mensa people.

It's them who are really the movers and shakers in this world. And they don't care about race. Race is not important to them. To them it's all about passing an advanced physics course without even trying. And it doesn't matter if you're black as shit, if you can do that, they'll give a shit about you.

Brain power is one of the most well appreciated and valued assets to the corporate world. Nothing and I mean NOTHING is more valuable to them than intellect.

 Which makes the world seem strange to me. Sure enough this world is full of crazy. But damn. It's like I watch porn and I see a bitch eating 50 dicks and acting a fool and I wonder why was there ever a sense of like actual civility displayed on tv back in the old days if indeed life is just all about having a massive fuck party.

It doesn't make sense...........

I mean why do we supposedly value people of high levels of class and professionalism if EVERYBODY strips naked and fucks and shoots semen all over each other, making EVERYBODY on the same level in the end.

That's the hardest thing for me personally to make an lick of sense of. I suppose there is no making sense of it. It's just like, one of those things in life that are just stupid yet we don't try to make sense of it. It's like how we have a bunch of laws that don't make any sense and benefit no one. Wait until marriage. This whole gay pride thing. Does that shit make sense? Or is it just insanity being allowed to run rampant.

I don't know. I just don't know...